We flew Jet Blue to NYC on Wednesday night not only to save a huge chunk of money, but so we would have the entire day following for sight-seeing. The flight was okay, although the seating was a bit cramped for a person my height. Each seat had a monitor with Direct TV and an outlet where you can plug in your own headphones which was pretty cool.
I got to watch the George Lopez show and Sports Center on the way to New York .
When we arrived, the weather was grey and gloomy with a nagging drizzle. We booked a shuttle via Airlink to take us to our hotel and we got this grumpy Jamaican creep for a driver. This guy practically yelled at a customer when they got on the wrong shuttle. He was a dick and a half and brooded and grumbled the entre drive. One thing I learned about New Yorkers is they’re extreme. They are either the coolest person you’d ever want to meet or a complete jerk that you dream of punching in the face.
We got to the Hotel early and of course the room wasn’t ready so we checked in our bags and headed out for a day on the town. We stayed right around the corner from the mecca of Basketball, the world famous Madison Square Garden which was not only a stadium, but a shopping mall!
The weather started to clear up in the afternoon and it ended up being a beautiful day. In fact, the weather couldn’t have been more pleasant and we were blessed with gorgeous skies for the duration of our trip.
We booked one of those “Hop on/Hop off” Bus tours that drives you around the city with a tour guide telling you the history behind various landmarks and such. If you’ve never been to NY, I highly recommend taking one of these tours as they take you all around the city in relatively good time.
Aside from cabs, there are very few regular motorists on the road in Manhattan . I’d say roughly 85% of the vehicles are cabs, shuttles and busses and the rest are pissed off delivery Truck drivers… and EVERYONE in New York drives with a chip on their shoulder. You would be hard-pressed to go 10 seconds without hearing the honk of a horn… and incidentally, there’s a law against honking your horn in certain sections of the city.
If this law was ever enforced, the city would make out big time. Speaking of laws, NONE of the laws of the road are enforced. Everyone runs red lights. I mean EVERYONE! I’ve never seen a bigger collective of maniacs on the road than in Manhattan . Apparently, it’s customary to run red lights. A friend of mine that lives in Jersey said that red lights are optional in NYC… and his words rang true. When the light turns red, three, four, five and six cars kept going… and RIGHT in front of the police!
Even our tour bus continually ran red lights and blocked the intersection with no fear of a moving violation… and one of our drivers ran into a BMW during our tour! We had to get out and walk.
Speaking of police, there are 38,000 officers alone in NYC. I think that’s why there’s a Dunkin’ Donuts on every corner in NY. You can’t walk a block without seeing a cop, but since there are so many people, they couldn’t care less what you’re doing. Like in Grand Theft Auto, you have to do something wrong directly in line of sight to get popped from the fuzz… and I don’t think there’s a such thing as Jay walking in NYC. Sure, there are signs, but it’s not like anyone pays attention.
I think they rely on the cameras on every corner to capture all of the action.
There’s also a Duane Reade drug store on EVERY corner. Literally! Whoever this guy is, he must be wealthy beyond belief.
As crazy as the motorists are in NY, the pedestrians are just as crazy. They walk directly into oncoming traffic and expect those maniacs to stop. I’m convinced that at least half the people living in the city are trying to commit suicide since it’s so damn crowded. Noon time in Manhattan is insanely crowded. People here, people there, people EVERYWHERE!.. and folks are used to bumping into each other and shrugging it off.
The women of NY are gorgeous! If I had a dollar for every hot Puerto Rican babe I saw, I could retire comfortably. There are quite a few tourist Euros as well that were smoking hot. They were tall, exotic-looking, had dark hair and piercing, light eyes and luscious, kissable lips like Miranda Kerr.
Too bad most of them had horrible manners. There should be a mandatory basic etiquette and common courtesy class before you come to the states. These people sorely lack common courtesy skills… or just don’t give a damn. Either way, most of them were quite rude and apparently, “excuse me” isn’t in their vocabulary.
There were a good amount of Asians too. Most of them were tall, athletic-looking and practically all of them had nice, shapely legs with those succulent gams and tiny, defined ankles that makes me drool.
I’m shocked I didn’t get caught staring. :p
One of the worst things about NY is the pollution. The entire city smells like vehicle exhaust. In addition to that, EVERYONE smokes cigarettes. If you see a huddle outside a store, it’s probably a group sharing a smoke. If you’re in NY and can’t smell either cigarette smoke or car fumes, you probably have a sinus infection.
When we finally got our passes after waiting in a long line, we hopped on our bus and were on our way to touring the city. Compared to California , all the buildings outside of downtown NY looked historic, like they had a million stories to tell. It is one of the oldest cities in America , but you don’t realize that until you marvel at the architecture on some of the older buildings, particularly the Churches.
The bus took us to Harlem which was pretty cool. We got to see the nationally famous Apollo theater.
One of the bigger misconceptions about Harlem is that it’s a slum filled with thugs and criminals, but from where we stood, it was no different from any other section in NY.
It was cool to see some of the older buildings that were made entirely of bricks. It made me think of the children’s story “Three Little Pigs.” I’ll huff, puff and blow your house down!
What was interesting was there were businesses on the bottom floors of apartment buildings where people lived, particularly in Chinatown, Soho and Little Italy … and these tiny apartments go for $1700 a month!
We got to see the United Nations Building, but didn’t hop off as there were too many other sights to see.
From there, we headed to Times Square where everything was big, bright and larger than life.
Even their Toys R Us was larger than life.
It had a 5-story Ferris Wheel INSIDE of the store in addition to an Ice Cream store and Candy shoppe. Now that I think back, I should have checked to see if they had any DCUC figures.
Even their sports shops were huge and all over the place. I’ve never seen so many Foot Lockers, Champs and Lids shops in one area.
Aside from having a good time and taking in the sights, one of my main objectives was to piss off as many New Yorkers as I could by representing California sports… and I got some major heel heat by wearing my BRIGHT Orange Giants jersey in the heart of Yankeesville… and this was WAY before the Giants won the World Series. They were playing the Braves in the NLDS while we were in NYC and I got to see them clinch in game 4 on the flight back. Fear the Beard, bitches!
New Yorkers lost their minds seeing someone sporting a California team. People would walk by me shouting “Yankees! Hey!! Yankees!!!” It was pretty funny. If I was short, I probably would have gotten mugged. I had several people walk up to me start conversations about baseball and who was going to the World Series. Heh heh. A lot of the people were cool about it. One older gent from San Francisco talked to me for about 10 minutes on how he wanted to see the Yankees and Giants in the Fall Classic. Another guy that worked at the Empire State Building did the same and we ended up contrasting and comparing our pitching staff. Looks like I was right! Heh heh!
One of the landmarks I’ve longed to see was Lady Liberty, the Statue and Al ice Island . I’ve called it Al ice instead of Ellis because of the Garbage Pail Kids sticker from years ago.
I was actually kind of nervous to see this landmark because this has been something I wanted to see since I was young and I never thought I’d get the chance.
For some reason, I thought the Statue of Liberty would be 3x bigger than it was. Still, it was cool to realize a travelling dream of mine. What sucked ass was you needed an appointment to go inside the statue and there’s a freaking waiting list 3 months long! When I booked the tour, I was under the impression that the pass included everything since it wasn’t mentioned, but of course, that’s a separate charge. If you didn’t know, now you know.
After taking 100 or so photos, we took the ferry to the Ellis Island museum. From the ferry, we got some neat, clear shots of the city.
Later that day, we took the bus over to the Rockefeller Center for the “Top of the Rock” tour which featured some beautiful, unobstructed views of the city.
My wife with me and my neon jersey pissing off the city.
We also got to see the famous Radio City also in the Rockefeller Center plaza in addition to the Prometheus statue.
Later that evening, we took a night tour which featured the city illuminated in all its glory and splendor. There were some breathtaking shots that I could have taken, but like Cinderella’s pumpkin, my camera turns into a piece of crap at night and ruined most of the good photo ops. Tip: Invest in a good camera BEFORE you go on vacation!
I was pissed that the photos didn’t come out well as it was during a clear, breathtaking sunset. The following day, we went to the NYCC which is a blog tale for another time.
After the con madness, we got up early to take the Empire State Building tour. In comparison, I much preferred the Rockefeller Center tour as there was more room to maneuver and take photos. The ESB was crowded beyond belief.
There were 4 separate lines (like above) that you had to wait in to finally get to the observatory deck. Insanity! Once you got to the deck, it was just as crowded.
Once you pushed and shoved your way into a crevice of the building, you could get some pretty nice shots of the city.
From there, we checked out Ground Zero and were shocked to learn that they were reconstructing the towers.
A hop, skip and a jump away from the reconstruction site was the Brooklyn Bridge . This area was unbelievably crowded. This was another landmark that I’ve wanted to see for years and pose in front of.
Because I’m an egomaniac. :p
Later on, we went back to Times Square and were treated to a live taping of the Jerry Springer show. JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
After the Springer show, we strolled along Times Square to take some more photos and hang out.
While doing my trademark pose, a cop that looked like Rick Ross saw me, came over and said “Hey! You can’t stand here and do that… wearing THAT jersey!” LOL! Turns out he was a Knicks fan and didn’t take too kindly to Lakers fans. He ultimately ended up being a cool guy and took a photo of my wife and I in Times Square .
The last thing we did was take a trip to Midtown Comics to see 3 floors of comic heaven!
We were in NY for four nights, but it wasn’t long enough, well, thanks to the NYCC taking up an entire day. Even though my original objective in pissing off the locals was fulfilled, there wasn’t enough time to do everything we wanted. There were still a few landmarks and sights we didn’t get to see like Yankees Stadium and Grand Central Terminal and we didn’t get to stroll around the massive Central Park in addition to checking out the hoopsters at Rutger’s. We had a free pass to the Museum of Modern Art , but never found the time to get there because of all the lines we had to wait in along with Manhattan ’s endless traffic. Still, it was an enjoyable experience and one that I’d gladly do over again, (perhaps for next year’s NYCC) although my wife didn’t care for it because of the pollution, the masses of humanity and the overall rudeness of several people like our shuttle driver into the city who was a complete ass. When we were checking out, the Hotel clerk at the desk told me, “You’d never make it in this city because you’re not LOUD enough.” LOL! Being my size, I don’t need to be loud.
Overall, New York was a great place to visit with over a million things to do, but I most certainly would not want to live there.
